9:29: On Showing Up, Making a change, and Remembering George Floyd,

I Can’t Believe It’s Been Two Years.

His death changed my life in ways I never thought were possible. He became the catalyst to get out and work toward the future we talked about. Activists have been doing this work for decades, but this was the first time I was able to expand my work outside of the computer screen and into the streets.

Mural of George Floyd, his name in large orange letters, his image in the center in front of. a large sunflower

Mural creaed by Xena Goldman, Cadex Herrera, and Greta McLain, with the help of Niko Alexander and Pablo Hernandez

 

On June 25, 2020…

It feels so surreal to acknowledge how his murder has changed my life. If you were doing racial justice work in any capacity, you were called upon to explain this particular horrific event repeatedly. Talk about the context and this history. Joining panels, writing articles, getting book deals, correcting and checking people.

The fallout was watching more and more people “wake up” and having my work be in much more demand than ever before. I started making a lot more money because people wanted to know how they could be better. And at the time (maybe six months later), I remember remarking on how my business was thriving during an economic downturn, a raging pandemic, and the aftermath of the loss of human life.

Speaking at the Good Trouble Vigil in 2021

I was reminded of how easy it was that they would kill me anyway. I felt that fear and panic I had grappled with years before, during the summer of 2015, when the work of Black & Bookish began. I was already doing as much as I could have been from home- now I had to take it to the streets.

I marched and preached and yelled. Some days I cried and closed myself off, and some days I built and rebuilt connections with friends and activists around the country. I talk about George Floyd as the catalyst for where I am now because it is true.

People would ask why I was willing to risk my health and safety to protest during an airborne pandemic, and I always said, “because they will kill me anyway.”

When I helped deliver groceries for community members who wouldn’t leave their homes, I knew it was because “they will kill me anyway.” When I volunteered with unhoused folks in the San Fernando Valley and volunteered myself into a full-time job helping people get off the street, I did it because “they will kill us anyway.” I could no longer sit and talk about being the change- I was ready to live it.

 

After June 25, 2020…

I’m humbled by the opportunity to speak on George Floyd, or Perry as his family called him, on the anniversary of his death. I know very little about him, always thinking that his life mattered no matter what. I didn’t have to know what kind of man he was to know he did not deserve to die. I found out later that he wanted to make a change in the world. That’s something we have in common. I’m also grateful to have a platform to show how my work has changed.

WeSpa Action in Downtown Los Angeles to support Trans Women

I got right off my butt and joined Black Lives Matter-Los Angeles (BLM-LA) in person at their march that following weekend. I made sure to take a buddy and some signs, and I was ready. I believe we also had earplugs, snacks, water, and a first aid kit. I knew that things could escalate here, so we wanted to ensure we had all the right gear. We had a long day of marching and repeating chants. Things did escalate, and the City of Los Angeles enacted a curfew, shutting down public transit and businesses. We were stranded for a bit, but we got home safely due to some good samaritans.

The protests didn’t stop, and because of the fantastic work of BLM-LA, changes in public policy and public spending began to change. And two years later, LA activists don’t have all the things we have been asking for.

Speaking at the Studio City Drop In Program

I’ve seen where my energies can manifest changes in my neighborhood in the past two years. I took some time away from writing and editing to be a body on the front lines. I haven’t been quiet about it on purpose, but every day became a new adventure. I was inspired to join environmental justice actions and speak on just transitions. I helped build a thriving Pop-Up, Drop-In Access Program for the Unhoused in the Studio City neighborhood, just around the corner from where I live. I also traveled to Line 3 in Minnesota and participated in their local actions in solidarity with the Indigenous community. I got to speak at the LA Women’s March last year and was nominated by the AAMBAC for Literary Activist of the Year. I also started building a spiritual activist community centered on healing and equity.

I have been fortunate in so many ways to participate in these movements. I have had unwavering support from friends, family, and followers, and I am blessed beyond anything I could have imagined.

 

Visiting George Floyd Memorial Square

I had the chance to visit Minneapolis in February of 2022. I wanted to see what his community had done for him and hopefully take back some of the lessons to my part of the world (mind you, Los Angeles is HUGE, and the work of BLM-LA isn’t always in my backyard). Once this Florida girl was able to adjust to the below-freezing weather, I was in complete awe of the whole area. The memorials that were still up. The signs and spaces that had been created. Although no longer an autonomous zone, it still held the Beloved Community flourishes that have been their norm since that tragic day.

Personal Photos Taken At George Floyd Memorial Square

It is so breathtaking. 

The snow and ice sparkled in the sun, new from the morning’s snowfall. The square was empty except for my companions and me. Maybe I expected there to be more people moving from place to place? (Again, it was at least five below freezing in the middle of the day, so I can understand why people would not have been out.)

But the beauty of this was not without tragedy. Amir Locke had been shot the night before in the same city. We learned of the shooting as we boarded our plane home that evening. I remember saying, “I can’t believe this keeps happening.” We couldn’t stay and join the actions of local activists, but we mourned him here in Los Angeles and continued to uplift his name. 

I can’t believe this keeps happening. What are we going to do? 

Yesterday the Los Angeles Sheriffs shot and killed someone in East LA. We also learned of the Uvalde, Texas shooting yesterday, listening for up-to-the-minute news updates. 

Why is this still happening? Today I’m at a loss for what to do. 

 

Reading and Remembering His Life

This week I began reading “His Name is Geroge Floyd” and ambitiously thought I would finish reading the publication before today. In fact, I expected this post to be a book review of that book. As you can see, this isn’t a book review but a review of my own life for the past two years. From what I have read so far, he was a gentle and loving man that was trying his hardest to live in a world that didn’t value his life. The authors interviewed his friend and family, old teachers, and community members. They dug deep into his history and the history of his ancestors. I couldn’t help but smile as I learned about the ways his family loved on him. The imagery is solid and easy to picture. Every paragraph is an in-depth look at the breadth of his life. It’s beautiful.

You will get a longer and more formal review of this title soon, and I am incredibly excited to finish it and talk about it.

George Floyd wanted to make a change in the world. He would never know how significant his change has been, but many of us can continue to fight in his name, for when we fight, we win.